Writing this article I assume that you actually want to move out from your parents. If you don’t, I hope this post will make you think again.
Many of us struggle deciding Should I stay or Should I go? The less risky a person is, the harder it is to make the final decision. You may bounce back and forth between two decisions endlessly.
Eventually, you may prefer to stay at parents home “for a little while more”.
That is wrong decision, of course.
My opinion is dogmatic, because moving out is really a must-be-taken step on your path from childhood to adulthood.
Leaving the nest is important for improving your social skills and life skills overall.
Perhaps, today we rely on Google too much in terms of decision-making. We browse social networks and forums relying on other people’s views. Sometimes it helps.
However, some tips for moving out of your parents house you may find in www do not help. Instead, they may turn off you from the crucial adult decision you are about to make.
Some tips you may encounter on the Internet, some you may receive from your off-line environment. All of them do more harm than good.
Here they are:
1 Moving out with no money is a good idea
We all admire people who can make money from nothing in a short period of time, but are you really sure you can find enough $$$ to pay your bills in the end of the month without a traditional job?
Do not overestimate your financial skills, and your social skills. Perhaps, your plan is to move out and then suddenly come up with a brilliant business idea, or talk your friend into letting you stay at his/her place for a night, and stay a little bit longer. It’s a bad idea. It won’t work.
You may improve skills, mentioned above, later. But for now make sure you have a regular 9 to 5 job which covers your basic needs in rent and food before moving out of home.
Also it’s a good precaution to save up a budget which may cover 3 months of your expenses if you lose your job for some reason.
2 Wait for perfect circumstances
You may want to postpone your leave until you find that perfect place you dream of with a splendid view of the city/ocean/mountains.
Or perfect neighbours who are no less than your soulmates.
You may be telling yourself that you’re ready to move out from parents when you find a better paid job (which you also would love), or when the country’s economics overcomes crisis.
You may convince yourself that if every of these circumstances falls into place, you’re ready to leave. But that’s a trap.
Excuses, like these, for not moving out will come up again and again.
Perfect is bad.
In fact, all you need in order to move out is a job (which you may not even like) to cover your basic expenses.
Mediocre results are better than the results postponed forever.
3 Think everything ahead
If you try to think every possible obstacle you may stumble upon when living on your own ahead, it may hold you back from taking actual actions at all.
I’m a person who does not like surprises. Even for birthday, I prefer receive gifts from the clearly determined wishlist.
I like plans. Sometimes I go too far and spend too much time on planning than doing. This is my flaw I struggle with.
So if you, like me, are striving to create not only Plan A (everything goes smoothly), Plan B (something goes wrong), but also plans C, D and all the letters of alphabet for every minor issue you possibly may encounter, be sure you will not advance too far in this case.
4 Creating an overly-exaggerated moving out of your parents house checklist
Again, this is the result of the belief that everything must be perfect. Create a small checklist with the most necessary things you need to have for the first week of moving in to your new place. The rest you may buy later.
For example, you may not need desktop PC the first day you moved in. You may transport it from your room in parents house on the following weekend.
If your new place does not have a washing machine, that’s not a tragedy either. I’m pretty sure you may find some decent laundry service around your block. Or ask your friend, who has the washing machine, for help.
5 Make a strong decision
If you’re a cautious person, this tip may fire back on you.
In fact, you do not have to be 100% sure to move out from parents.
6 Reach a certain age
No, no, no. If you’re able to cover your basic needs living on your own, you’re ready to leave, whether you’re 16 or 35 years old.
For example, here are the results of a poll taken at GiantBomb forums, showing average age people move out of parents house:
7 Your parents should stimulate you
While some parents harshly stimulate their children to leave the nest right after they graduate from school, other ones may be neutral or even prefer their kids to stay with them longer.
At the same time they may believe that children should move out some day in the future. But this future never comes.
Do not rely on your parents for this decision.
Find out more about excuses your parents may use to keep you beside them.
8 Find a love partner first
You may argue that there’s no reason for you to move out from parents before you find a love partner.
Wrong. In fact, it’s harder to find a love partner while you live with parents.
The reason is obvious: the other person may consider you as immature because you still live with parents. Thus s/he may refuse build any relationship with you.
9 Become financially independent before moving out from parents
It’s unlikely that you may reach this goal living with your parents.
As long as you live with them high chance is that you’re going to stay in your childish financially dependent mindset, which does not help make more money.
The study shows that people who moved out of the parental home at 21-24 had the best outcome in terms of their income and asset wealth when they reached the ages of 35-54.
Human brain does not like to work, it likes to have a rest and have fun.
Comfort conditions of your parents’ house anti-stimulate it. You may wish to change the situation, earn more money, build a career, but your brain, realizing that it may relax instead of working now, will, for sure, put off taking any action as long as it can.
It is hard to leave the cozy environment your loving parents have built for you. You lived there whole life, you’re used to it.
However, moving out and finding your own place to live is an exceptionally necessary step, which you should not ignore, if you want to be considered as an adult.
Your parents will be proud of you in the end, even if they don’t say so now.
Featured image by Stuart Miles, FreeDigitalPhotos.net